i changed my okcupid profile to say “you should message me if you know any good jokes about giraffes” and someone responded “you, a baby, and a giraffe walked into a bar, and then you walked out with me! ;) ;)” and i’m so angry because that doesn’t even make sense, there is ZERO adherence to structural joke norms, why the fuck is the baby there? did we leave the baby at the bar? jesus christ, did we fucking leave the baby with the fucking giraffe, that is NOT RESPONSIBLE
Why say “ding dong you are wrong” when you could say “eggs and bacon you’re mistaken”
okay so we know about jesus when he’s a baby, and jesus when he’s an adult, but does the bible ever mention his rebellious teenager years?
‘jesus, go feed the donkey.’
‘yOU’RE NOT MY REAL FATHER’
the ground shakes a little, and a voice comes down from the sky
‘do what your stepfather says you little shit’
has anyone actually had a neighbor thats asked to borrow sugar
no but one time my neighbor arrived with 56 packages of sugar saying there was a sale and he gave us 10 for free
your neighbor is the type of person we read about in math books
Meet Sable, the 1 in 100,000 melanic (oppsite of albino) Barn Owl that wasn’t rejected by its mother for its unique dark coloring.
It is now 3 weeks since Michael Brown was murdered by Ferguson PD Officer Darren Wilson. Officer Darren Wilson still has not been arrested, charged, or even brought to prison or court for the murder of Michael Brown.
consider this , how the fukc is it september